If you have ever experienced anxiety or fear (and really, who hasn't at some point?), then you know it can be extremely unpleasant. Depending on how lucky you are, you might just feel a few butterflies in your stomach. However, you might get the full force of chest constriction, wheezing breath, and feeling like you are going to throw up.
Usually we know what is making us feel 'fear-full'-maybe you have a presentation to do, or you are going to meet someone you admire. Sometimes fear and anxiety come on for no particular reason though. You get all the symptoms but have none of the reasons to account for what you are feeling.
Have you ever gone through this, or know someone who has? Chances are good you do.
Learning techniques to handle fear and anxiety - before they strike - will help you to get through any possible panic attacks (or mild butterflies) that might come your way. I've described techniques below that I use myself whenever anxiety strikes (oh yes, I get the wheezing breath, an elephant is sitting on my chest variety). They have proved useful time and again to get my body back to a nice relaxed state, I hope they work equally as well for you!
Technique #1: What shape is your body in?
When I ask what shape your body is in, I'm not referring to your exercise program or whether you're eating properly (although both are important to keeping your body in good condition and stress free).
The body shape I'm referring to is the actual physical form your body has taken when the anxiety or fear hits.
Let's do a little exercise because pictures speak a thousand words. Imagine you are walking through the park on a nice sunny day. You see a baseball game going on and stop to watch for a few minutes. The batter hits a ball high in the sky - right towards you! You look up but the sun is in your eyes and you can't see the ball. What do you do? You probably saw yourself cover your head with your arms to protect your head and face. What did the rest of your body do? Did you curl over a little to protect your vital organs?
When we are feeling threatened or have any fear coursing through our body we instinctively protect our heart. This results in rounding your shoulders to close your chest and surround your heart with other body parts. Most of the time we have no idea we are doing this; it's instinctive.
Feelings of anxiety or fear can cause the same physical response. So, what do you do?
The simplest technique I've found to counteract the instinctive closing of my chest and shoulder rounding from anxiety is to lift my breastbone. Sounds a bit funny, doesn't it? When you lift your breastbone, however, you are putting your body back into its natural alignment, with shoulders back and your spine in its natural curve.
To lift your breastbone lightly place your fingertips on it. Then lift it skywards. It will probably only move a few millimetres or a centimetre, but you'll feel the change in your body instantly.
This is a great technique to do all the time to help ensure you have good posture. Much better than taping a yard stick to your back!
Technique #2: Where is the tension?
Anxiety and fear will also lodge itself in muscles all over your body. The main culprits to watch out for are your lower stomach muscles and your shoulders.
Lifting your breastbone is great for moving your shoulders back to their normal position, but it won't necessarily drop your shoulders if you are rigidly holding them up. For me, this is my number one sign that I am feeling anxious-my shoulders feel like they are up around my ears. Most of the time I am not even aware of it, though.
To relax your shoulders first become aware of them. You'll notice immediately if you are holding them up at all. Then consciously relax them and let them drop. You might notice it suddenly gets easier to breath when you do this.
The other common culprits for tense muscles are your lower abdominals and bum. Draw your attention to your stomach area, particularly your lower stomach; are you holding it in? Just like your shoulders, consciously release it. Now do the same for your bum. Consciously relax your muscles.
How do you feel?
Scan your body and find other places you are holding tension. Are your hands balled up? What about your toes? Your thighs? Anywhere you find tension, focus your attention on the area and consciously relax it.
Although it may not feel like it when you are stressed, you are the master of your body. Willing your body to relax is a powerful technique that can quickly turn a bout of anxiety and fear on its head.
So, now you've lifted your breastbone, relaxed your muscles, let's work on breathing.
Technique #3: The breath knows and shows
If you watched the first season of the television show Lost, you may remember the character Shannon. In one of the first few episodes she has an asthma attack - but her inhaler was lost in the plane crash. The doctor Jack explains calmly to her that yes, she is having an asthma attack, however, the fear of not having her inhaler is making the attack worse. He asks her to focus on her breathing in order to help calm herself down and ease off the attack. If you've ever seen someone have an asthma attack, or had one yourself, you know how scary it can be to have your windpipe close to a pinhole and fight for air through it.
Fear and anxiety can have the same throat closing technique that asthma attacks have, without the aid of an inhaler to open your windpipe up again. Watching your breath is a great way to check your internal emotional state. If you are experiencing any fear that is shortening your breath, ways to get back to normal breathing are invaluable.
These two breathing techniques have been incredibly helpful in getting much needed oxygen through the pinhole of my anxious throat:
The first technique you can do anywhere, at any time, and no one will be the wiser. The technique takes a few practice tries to get the hang of, so I recommend trying it when you are nice and relaxed. It's a great way to make use of time while waiting in the checkout line at the store!
First, stand (or sit) up straight. Lift your breastbone, drop your shoulders, relax your stomach and bum muscles. Then slowly draw a breath in through your nose for a count of ten. Once you've drawn the breath in, slowly let it out through your nose, again counting to ten. Continue to breath in and out for a count of ten each way. Getting to that count of ten can be a bit tricky at first which is why having a few practice rounds while waiting in line or sitting at a red light can help.
The second technique is a yoga breathing technique (it's simple and requires no body contortions, I promise!) It is called nadi shodhana, or 'alternate nostril breathing'.
Sit with a straight back (on a chair, cross-legged on the floor, on the couch with your feet on the floor). With each breath you take, aim to fill your lungs completely, starting at the bottom of your lungs up to the top. Begin by pressing your right thumb against the right nostril. Now take a long, deep breath, drawing the breath in through the left nostril gently. Then press your right ring finger against the left nostril and release the right thumb. Gently expel the breath through the right nostril. Then inhale gently through the right nostril. Again press the right thumb against the right nostril and release the right ring finger, opening the left nostril. Gently exhale through the left nostril. You've completed one round. Do at least ten rounds. Ten rounds will probably take you about five to seven minutes to complete.
This exercise will help you stabilize your breathing and it is very good for bringing your concentration back to centre at any time. I have noticed that when I do this exercise every day, I feel much more balanced and calm. If ever I stop doing alternate nostril breathing, then after a period I'll start getting anxiety attacks again. That is a great reason to fit in five minutes for it if I ever heard one!
So, whether it is before a big meeting or for no reason at all, the next time you feel any anxiety or fear in your body, start by lifting your breastbone, then relax the muscles in your body wherever they feel tense, and finally do one or both of the breathing exercises. The beauty is that no one has to know you're going through your relaxation routine! All they will see is your outward peaceful, calm demeanour.
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